Tag: Liberia Page 2 of 3

The Place That Was Home

I was wrenched from my home at age 13.  Of course, I say that figuratively, as we were in the States on home assignment when the war started in Liberia.  However, many of my friends were literally wrenched away, on emergency evacuation planes.  

We kept hoping that the whole thing would blow over, but as the war progressed, our mission made the decision to relocate us to Ethiopia.  I cried that day like I never had before.  The plan had been for us to spend the next four years in Liberia–which would have been all of high school for me.  Instead, the course of my life changed dramatically.

I never had closure with Liberia.  My roots were pulled up without my permission, suddenly and unexpectedly, and in the course of just a couple of months, deposited in another country.  When you yank off a band-aid really quickly, it hurts pretty bad.  

“For many of us [TCK’s], the only thing we feel we have left are our memories.  We cannot go back to the place that was home.”  (Marilyn Gardner)

It was the days before digital photography, when photos were sparse and treasured.  And on top of that, we lost many of the photos we did have to the war.  So for a long time, most of what I knew of Liberia was left only to my memories.  

That is, until the recent years of social media.  Those of us who grew up in the idyllic paradise that was the ELWA compound started networking.  Maybe we only had a few photos each, but we started sharing them.  A few people went back to Liberia, and took new pictures.  And I saw before my eyes my childhood being recreated in pictures.  Places that had only existed in my memories began to reappear in actual images.  It’s been incredibly meaningful.

So today, you get to see my childhood too.

I should note that I don’t know who took many of these pictures, as they were shared on ELWA sites without names.  But I am exceedingly grateful to whoever did.

This was my home.  ELWA compound was established in the 50’s mainly as a radio station but grew into a hospital and school as well.  The compound was a square mile in size and housed up to 70 missionary families at it’s height, as well as many Liberian families.  For a few months during the war in 1990, it sheltered something like 30,000 people–until the bombs started falling there too.  

The above picture was taken from one of the radio station towers–which used to broadcast all over West Africa.

As kids, we had free reign of this compound.  We rode our bikes everywhere and our moms didn’t worry. All the families had motorcycles, and my dad would often take me in the evenings to collect the mail, riding backwards and barefoot as the sun set over the ocean.  The center of the compound was still untamed jungle, and many a young boy (and sometimes the girls) would tromp through it on daring adventures.  

The beach was our backdrop on weekdays and our playground on Saturdays.  Many of the houses were built only fifty feet from the water.  In this first picture, the house in the distance was directly across the road from our house.  

The picture below was our house.  This is fairly recent picture, taken by a school friend who visited a couple of years ago.  The picture makes me sad, because the house looks so tired and worn out now, when it was such a place of joy for me.  It used to be surrounded by palm trees and all kinds of vegetation, all of which were cut down during the war.  When I was a child, the thick jungle in the back of our house was much wilder, bringing in the occasional green mamba.

photo credit:  Ghada Abouchacra Tajeddine

This is one of the few pictures I have of me in that house.  I’ve got my red-checked sewing bag next to me, which I made in second grade and used until seventh grade.  Lost in the war.

Did you see that big porch?  We had a hammock on that porch, and I would sit in it for hours.  

And this?  This was the view from that hammock on that porch.  Whoever took this picture must have been standing in our yard.  Sometimes, when it was raining, I would sit here and watch the lightning hit the water.  We regularly got 200 inches of rain every year.  

One time in that lagoon, millions of minuscule baby crabs hatched, covering every available surface.  

This swamp was directly next to our house and across from the lagoon.  Back when I lived there, it was covered with lily pads.  Sometimes we would take a canoe out onto this swamp and walk around on the mangroves.  

photo credit:  Robin Shea McGee

This was the road heading away from our house, towards dozens of other missionary houses and my school.  This is a recent picture, so the coconut trees are smaller than they were in my day.  They are the replacements from all those cut down during the war.

photo credit:  Robin Shea McGee

About twice every year during the rainy season, the lagoon would fill up so much that the sand barrier between it and the ocean would break open, creating a crazy crazy water slide which would only last for a day or so.  Everyone always greatly anticipated this event.  After just a few hours, it would slow down to the trickle you see in the picture below, but until then, we rode the rapids.

photo credit:  Bethany Fankhauser

My brother and I in front of the lagoon.  

A despised event was the time every year when all the Portuguese-men-of-war would wash up on the shore, thousands of them.  You couldn’t swim that day; their stings were legendary.

Every morning, we walked along the beach road until we got to this path.  There was a shortcut through those trees which led to school.  

photo credit (and the next two):  Robin Shea McGee 

And this was that path.

This is a recent picture of the wall surrounding ELWA Academy, which was white when I was a kid.

To the right of this picture are school buildings, and on the left is the gym, which also functioned as our church and meeting hall.

Photo credit:  Robin Shea McGee
photo credit:  Matthew Molenhouse

There are still missionaries in Liberia, and the ELWA Hospital was the central point of the Ebola fight two years ago.  The radio station was rebuilt after it was leveled during the war.  However, most of the houses are now filled with Liberians, which is really how it should be.  Big compounds filled with missionaries was the old way of doing missions, and thankfully organizations have figured out that there’s better ways to reach people than putting all the missionaries together.  But it sure was an extraordinary place to grow up.  And since I never did get to say good-bye, I’m so thankful for pictures that let me see it one last time.  

Dear Mom and Dad, If I Suffered, It Was Worth It

ELWA Mission Station in Liberia, source unknown

Dear Mom and Dad,

Last week I read an article called “Should the Children Suffer?”  It’s about a missionary father’s struggle to trust God with the suffering his children are experiencing on the mission field.

In 1982, you took my younger brother and me to west Africa.  In the months preceding that move, I remember listening to you and my Gram–your mother–weeping loudly as you tried to get her to understand that decision.  Gram was not only devastated, she was angry.  And she even threatened to hire a lawyer to try to get custody of Paul and me.  Another grandparent fretted out loud over our deprived childhoods.

Some people would probably say that Paul and I suffered.

Paul got Hepatitis in Liberia. I got amoebic dysentery in Kenya.  Once we found a green mamba in our garage.  Twice, we lost almost all of our possessions due to war and evacuation.  In Ethiopia in 1991, there wasn’t much to eat.  We never went hungry, but we all got skinnier.  I went to boarding school at age 13.   Before college, I attended six different schools in four different countries.  I made friends and lost them more times than I could count.  I grew up never really knowing my cousins.  When we finally moved back to the States, Paul was bullied.  I was weird.  We were completely oblivious to styles and trends and TV shows.  I struggled deeply to figure out where I belonged.

Rift Valley Academy in Kenya, 9th grade, Swala Dorm

Was it a mistake to take us to Africa?

But then I think of those times in Liberia, Dad, when you would put me barefoot on the back of your motorcycle, and the ocean breeze would whip my hair as the sun set over the Atlantic.  We would pick up the mail and then stop by our favorite beach spot and collect shells.

I think of the times my friends and I would take the canoe out into the swamp, the fear of leeches and crocodiles keeping us out of the water, but we would prance across the spidery roots of the mangrove trees.  There are the memories of that time that the millions of baby crabs hatched, or the bright blue jellyfish that would wash ashore every July, or sitting in the hammock on our front porch and watching the lightning hit the ocean.

The swamp.  Our house in Liberia was directly to the right of this picture.

 Photo credit:  Robin Shea McGee

Denmark, Australia, and Lebanon became real to me because my school friends came from those places. Leprosy and malaria were real, because I saw them too.  I witnessed the devastation of war.  I played with a little boy whose family ate frogs from the swamp when they ran out of food.  I encountered a little girl with a huge abscessed eye, begging outside of the supermarket.  I may have been sheltered from Michael Jackson, but I was not sheltered from the reality of life.

The path we walked to school.  Photo credit:  Robin Shea McGee

By nature, I was cautious, timid, and not at all adventurous.  But this life you chose forced me to become brave.  Airplanes, head scarves, foreign accents, large bugs….all lost their strangeness and scariness.  International travel became routine.  The world would no longer intimidate me.

Scores of missionaries and Africans poured their love and their lives into mine.  I experienced the joy that comes from sacrifice.  Together our family learned what it meant to trust God.  I tasted and saw that Jesus was not just for America.

So yes, Mom and Dad.  There was stress, and there was fear, and there was so much loss.  You could call that suffering.  But the formation of my heart, the richness of that life, and the indestructible joy….make the suffering feel small.   

I know you didn’t make the choice to move to Africa because of Paul and me.  In fact, you made it despite us.  Like the author of that article, you chose to trust our safety and well-being to a Father who knows all about sacrificing his Son.  But in the end, it was the very best choice you could have made for your children.  I’m so glad you did.

Love,

Your Amy

Finding the Magic When Christmas Isn’t Perfect

Liberia, age 6

My favorite childhood Christmas was the year I was in 7th grade.  Though we didn’t know it at the time, it was my last Christmas in Liberia.  

That year, I had a lead part in the school Christmas production.  I was a chipmunk, and the fact that I found that exciting at age 12 explains a lot about missionary kids.  

Our neighbors on our mission station were from Arizona, and brought with them the Mexican tradition of luminarias, paper bag lanterns decorating the outside of their house.  My 7th grade year, we and a few other neighbors joined them, until our entire neighborhood street was filled with them.  The beauty, the stillness of that warm tropical Christmas eve, under a million stars, with our paper bag lanterns lining the road, far surpassed any electric Christmas lights I saw in America.  

I remember I loved my Christmas presents that year.  And yet the only specific gift I remember receiving was a silly little handmade stuffed creature who made its home in a coconut shell–something my mom had bought from a local artisan.  Gifts in Liberia were very hard to come by in those days, yet I never remember feeling deprived.

That Christmas eve, thieves broke into our home and stole our boom box and my mom’s purse.  Yet even that event couldn’t steal my joy, as we were thankful they didn’t take our presents or our turkey defrosting in the kitchen sink.  That Christmas, one of our guests that filled our home put a sparkler in that turkey.  

From that day on, it remained in my memory as The Perfect Christmas.

Today, that memory amuses me.  We had no cold weather, a tree that would have made even Charlie Brown sad, rather pathetic presents, and a robbery on Christmas eve.  Yet I was overwhelmed by happiness that year.  

Christmas in Tanzania never feels perfect.  We can say “Jesus is the reason for the season,” but we all know that we also look forward to the coziness, the beauty, the magic.  And that’s hard to find out here.  We are away from the people we love most.  Baking cookies produces the same amount of sweat as running a marathon.  I have to keep all the cookies in the freezer and take them out just 5 minutes before we eat them, lest they turn into puddles before they are consumed.  No one puts up lights, shopping is limited, and my creativity is put to the test as I figure out ways to substitute ingredients in our favorite foods.  

Then I look at my children and can tell that none of that matters to them.  They like our spindly plastic tree, they don’t mind that their gingerbread house has melted, and they will always associate Christmas with air conditioning, since it’s the only time of the year we run it.  As I internally complain, one day Grace might say, “My favorite Christmas was the year I was nine.”   I don’t want to miss that magic.  

  

Photo credit:  Unknown..  This picture was recently circulated on Facebook by Liberia MK’s.  In the distance, you can see our neighbor’s house.  Our house was just a few hundred feet away.  

Aiming at Heaven

It was May of 1989.  I was 12 years old, and my family was getting ready to leave the country where I had spent most of my childhood. 

We were leaving Liberia to go back to California for a year-long home assignment.  We packed up our house and put all our personal belongings into the spare room.  Another family would stay there for the year we were gone. 

The plan was that we would return in the summer of 1990, and would live in Liberia for my four years of high school. 

But during that year we were gone, a civil war broke out in Liberia.  It got worse.  And worse.

And finally it got so bad, that all the missionary women and children were evacuated.  Then the men were evacuated.  The compound where I grew up was bombed.  Many Liberian friends were killed.  We never returned.  My family was re-assigned to Ethiopia.

We lost everything.  Everything we owned was in Liberia, and it was all looted.  I lost my sixth grade journal, the painting my grandmother made me, and my childhood treasures.  More significantly, I lost my home country, my identity, my innocence. 

I never got to say good-bye, either to the country or the people I loved.  Liberia haunts my dreams; it remains an unfinished part of my life to this day.

Now, it’s May of 2013.  I am all grown up now, and our family is getting ready to leave the country where we’ve spent 10 years.  We are leaving Tanzania to go back to California for a year-long home assignment.  I am packing up our house and putting all our personal belongings into a spare room.  Another family will stay in this house for the year we are gone.

And I must admit; I am anxious.  The feelings are too eerily familiar to what I experienced as a child–packing up, leaving everything behind, assuming I will return.  So I find myself worrying that the same thing is going to happen again this time….that I will lose everything.

It’s a mostly irrational fear.  Tanzania is a far more stable country than Liberia was in 1989.  But the truth is, you never really know what’s going to happen in Africa. 

If there is one thing this life has taught me, it’s that I must hold loosely to everything.  Everything.  I can’t put down roots anywhere; I will never find stability.   I will never grow old in one house.  I may someday have to evacuate with the clothes on my back.  Or, I may just get robbed blind. 

But it’s okay.  Because it reminds me that I shouldn’t love this life too tightly anyway.  This life is not all there is, and it’s definitely not worth fretting over. 

Aim at heaven and you will get earth thrown in.  Aim at earth and you get neither.  C. S. Lewis

I Love My Kindle

I am now a reading fiend.  Gil told me that he read somewhere that Kindle users read 70% more than non-Kindle users.  Totally true for us.  The first year Gil got his Kindle, he met his goal of reading 100 books in One Year.  Oh yes.  I am expecting a thank-you note from Amazon any day now.

Here are some recent recommendations:

I have mentioned before that I grew up in Liberia, a country that later was ravaged by 15 years of brutal civil war.  This is the story of an ordinary woman (now a Nobel Peace Prize winner) who lived through it, and mobilized thousands of women to help stop it.  The subtitle says, “How Sisterhood, Prayer, and Sex Changed a Nation at War”–and that’s exactly what happened.  It’s horrifying and devastating to read (especially since she speaks of places where I walked and played), but ultimately hopeful.

Whew.  A depressing read, but I now have a passionate desire to burst into some US foreign policy meeting, ranting and raving.  I still like When Helping Hurts better, but this was also a fascinating book.  Very recommended for anyone interested in Africa.

“Over the past thirty years…the most aid-dependent countries have exhibited an average annual growth rate of minus 0.2 percent.  Between 1970 and 1998, when aid flows to Africa were at their peak, the poverty rate in Africa actually rose from 11 percent to a staggering 66 percent.” 

This was a free Kindle download, and I got it intending to read it to Grace.  I’m glad I didn’t, because it would have been too emotionally intense for her.  But it’s perfect for a 10-year-old.  Beautiful, creative, and simply told.  I will be looking for more by Kate DiCamillo.

What I did most recently read to Grace was The Secret Garden, which I remembered loving from my childhood.  And though she loved it, and it sparked good discussion on a pantheistic worldview, I would recommend to wait until your daughter can read this one herself.  That is, unless you happen to be particularly good with a Broad Yorkshire accent (‘Nowt o’ th’ soart’). What on earth?   Rather exhausting as a read-aloud!

Seems way too crazy to be true, but it is.  An 18-year-old high school graduate from an affluent family–popular, class president, homecoming queen–leaves her upper-middle-class life to live in a poverty-stricken village in Uganda.  Over the next 4 years, she adopts thirteen little girls.   Katie Davis is a modern-day Amy Carmichael or Jim Elliot.  Though her youth and naivete comes through, one cannot criticize her incredible passion for Christ.

“People often ask if I think my life is dangerous, if I am afraid.  I am much more afraid of remaining comfortable…  I am surrounded by things that can destroy my body.  I interact daily with people who have deadly diseases, and many times I am the only person who can hep them.  …  I am much more terrified of living a comfortable life in a self-serving society and failing to follow Jesus than I am of any illness or tragedy.”

This is a re-read of one of my top 5 favorite, most influential books of all time.  And I love it just as much the second time around.  This book profoundly changed my life.  Philip Yancey is a master storyteller and an engaging, talented writer who isn’t afraid to ask the hard questions or say it like it is.

“During a British conference on comparative religions, experts from around the world debated what, if any, belief was unique to the Christian faith….The debate went on for some time until C.S. Lewis wandered into the room.  ‘What’s the rumpus about?’ he asked, and heard in reply that his colleagues were discussing Christianity’s unique contribution among world religions. 

Lewis responded, ‘Oh, that’s easy.  It’s grace.'”

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