Would You Ever Pay a Bribe?

Would you ever pay a bribe?

If you’re like most westerners, you’ve never really had to think about it.  You’ve probably never been asked for one.  The temptation has never been there.  It’s a non-issue.

Consider yourself blessed.

For the majority of the world, the giving and receiving of bribes is commonplace.  Happens every day, on every socio-economic level, in just about every aspect of society.

Imagine your child’s public elementary school teacher requiring him to bring a dollar to school every day, or else he won’t be allowed to attend class.

Imagine your high school student being required to pay off her teacher if she expects to pass her exams.  Or worse, perform a sexual favor.

Imagine running a printing business, but you never win bids unless you are willing to do the job under the table, tax free.

It’s complicated.  Public employees are often grossly underpaid.  Sometimes there’s a fine line between a bribe and a tip.  In America, we give tips after we have received good service; so is there a huge difference in giving a tip in order to receive good service?  In some cultures, it’s seen as the same thing.

So where is the ethical line?  These are difficult waters to navigate, that most in the West don’t really need to think about.  But for us, regular life.  While living here, we have been asked for bribes, subtlety and not-so-subtlety, in a multitude of situations, more than I can count.

Gil and I, from the very beginning of our time in Tanzania, have been rock solid in our refusal to pay bribes or contribute to any kind of corruption.  For any reason, in any situation.  This has meant that we have sometimes spent a half hour arguing with some sort of official.  It’s meant that once I spent an entire day trying to pay a traffic ticket and receive a receipt for it.  (I could have paid the officer who pulled me over about $5 and been done in 2 minutes.)

We don’t buy pirated movies, even though they are available on every street corner in Dar (and the only kind of movies available here).  When I am quoted a price on a piece of furniture, and then told that if I want a receipt, I will have to pay an additional 20% (the amount of sales tax), I always insist on a receipt.  (And depending on what kind of mood I’m in, give them a little lecture as well.)

As Christians, we should be absolutely committed to integrity.  But is there ever a time and place when paying bribes is justified?  What about Oskar Schindler, rescuing Jews?  He paid lots of bribes.  What about the people who are smuggling Bibles into North Korea, who regularly bribe border guards?  Is that justified?  There’s probably no easy answer.

Finding out about the American illegal international adoptions(often by Christians) happening in Tanzania shook me to my core.  It’s been a long time since something made me so angry.  There is no way this is happening without bribery or other forms of corruption.  And I am fighting it this week, by writing personal letters to agencies and families, urging them to reconsider.

Yet I’m sure if I were face to face with these families, or with case workers from these agencies, they would justify what they were doing.  Isn’t it worth it to give a child a better life?  What hope do these children have?  What if they end up on the street?  What if they have a condition they could die from in this country?  Don’t the ends justify the means?

No.  For me, this is an easy answer.

And the difference between this situation and Nazi Germany, or North Korea, is that I still have hope for Tanzania and it’s government. If paying bribes in those situations were justified, it’s because bribes were used as a means of bringing down a government.  Yes, there is plenty of corruption going on here.  But I believe in the future of this country, and Tanzania’s problems could be helped significantly by eliminating corruption, not contributing to it.  Tanzania has adoption laws, and their goal is to protect children, so there is no reason not to follow those laws.  Corruption brings down governments.  Corruption breeds death.  Rescuing a few children, at the expense of millions of others, is just not worth it.  

Would I love to see international adoption happening in this country?  Yes, especially for special needs children.  Does a lot still need to change?  Is there still room for reform?  Of course.  But reform is not going to happen by enabling more corruption.

We Americans wring our hands about poverty and child-trafficking and orphan care.  Let’s not make the problem worse by trying to help in the wrong way.

If you ever hear of people pursuing a Tanzanian adoption who are not living here, please put them in touch with me.  



Term 3: Pretty Much All About Sports

These are a few of my favorite things:  First grade boys with no teeth

The fire truck visits kindergarten

Farmer Lily in her kindergarten assembly

Josiah on Sports Day….God made him fast!

This one’s fast too!  Won all her races that day.

And Lily….just had fun.  

The night before the races, I asked her, “What’s more important than winning, Lily?”

She said, “Letting other people win?”

Grade 3 Assembly

U9 Girls’ Soccer…and their fantastic coach!

Grace ran her first 5K…at age 9!  Josiah and Lily ran the 1K…and my little speedy, 40 pound 7-year-old boy took everyone down!  

And the winners are…..

Congratulations to my winners, and thank you to all who participated!  

Winners, please send me a personal message on Facebook with your addresses, so that we can send you your prize!

Brian and Bethany Lievens

Melinda Tillotson

Rebekah Giannini

(Please don’t blame Gil for the awful quality of these pictures….I am definitely not a photographer!)

Let Me Make Something Extremely Clear: I DO NOT WANT YOU TO ADOPT FROM TANZANIA

I realize that many, many times on this blog, I have been an advocate for international adoption.  I have been an advocate for Tanzanian adoption.  I have wanted Tanzanian laws to allow more adoptions.

I love Tanzania’s orphans.  I want to see more Tanzanians have a heart for adoption.  I want to see Tanzanian churches and Christians step up in the area of orphan care and adoption.

But let me make this crystal clear:  I would never, ever advocate for someone to adopt a child, from Tanzania or anywhere, by going around the laws of the country.

I discovered yesterday that this is exactly what is happening.  There are American adoption agencies, and American families–Christian families–who are attempting to adopt children in Tanzania.

Tanzanian adoption law is extremely clear.  You must live in this country for three years before you can apply to adopt.  There are no exceptions.  You foster a child for six months, and then you apply to legalize the adoption.  It always works that way.  It’s a slow process, it’s a frustrating process, but it works.

I am horrified…let me reiterate…HORRIFIED…to find out that there are American agencies and families who are trying to get around that process.  The only way–the ONLY WAY–that is happening is because major money is being shifted around.  I’m sure the families are in the dark about this.  They are trusting agencies and orphanages who should know better.

So when I see cute little fundraising pages for American (Christian) families who are raising money for their $30,000 Tanzanian adoption….the frustration, the outrage I feel just cannot be communicated in words.

All three of our adoptions have been incredibly ethical.  The process here is slow and frustrating, but it works.  It is also FREE, other than lawyers’ fees at the very end.  So where do you think the $30,000 is going?

What do you think that kind of corruption will breed?

Sure, you give a kid or two a better life, but what happens when all adoptions in Tanzania are shut down due to corruption?

I care about Tanzania’s orphans, but I also care about Tanzania.  I would never, ever endorse an adoption that will only breed more corruption, deceit, and most likely, child trafficking.

Please friends, if you are pursuing an international adoption, ask the hard questions!  Be wary of “Pilot Programs” in new countries!  Be wary of small agencies who don’t have much experience!  Don’t cut corners!  It’s just not worth it!

Please, if you know anyone pursuing a Tanzanian adoption (who is not a resident of Tanzania), share this with them.  My friends, let us love the orphan.  But let us love truth and justice too.

I’m only posting a cute orphan picture because I want people to click on this link.  Because seriously, I’m not in the mood for impressing the world with cuteness right now.  

*Update January 2016:  If you are considering a Tanzanian adoption and found this post through a Google search, please contact me.  I have a lot more information that I would love to share with you.  amedina(at)reachtanzania(dot)org.

Please also consider reading the series I wrote on adoption corruption, starting here.

The Death of My Hero

I fell in love with Jim when I was 18.

Elisabeth introduced me to him in her books.  When I would tell my friends that I planned to marry Jim Elliot, they would roll their eyes and remind me that he was not only 50 years older than me and already married, but he was, um, dead.  But I was not dissuaded.  The bar had been set.

I still put Shadow of the Almighty in the top 5 most influential books I’ve ever read.  My life changed as I read Jim’s story–a young man who was my age and yet totally and completely sold out for God in a way I had never seen or experienced.

Elisabeth didn’t put much of herself into her books about Jim, so I didn’t start getting to know her until I ventured out into her other books.  If I was in love with Jim, then soon after, I wanted to be Elisabeth.

We are given the present within which to choose whom we will serve, knowing that this moment affects the next and we are accountable for it.  

Elisabeth was no-nonsense.  Blunt.  Witty.  Very smart.  Tough, but gloried in being a woman.  She showed me what it meant to obey Christ.  She wasn’t into emotionalism or feeling sorry for herself.  Her mantra was Trust and Obey.  Period.  Yet she knew suffering:  She waited five years to marry the man she loved, and then three years later, lost him to Indian spears.  She was a widow and single mom for 10 more years, during which she went back to the remote Indian tribe that murdered her husband.  Her second husband died of cancer after four years of marriage.  I think she earned the right to talk about suffering.

Joy comes not in spite of, but because of, sorrow.

Her faith was unwavering.  Her joy was infectious.  She still is the most inspiring person I’ve ever known.  She is such a part of who I am that I have to remind myself I never met her in person.

When I met Gil in 1998, not only was he full of passion and vision for the world, but he was a huge Elisabeth Elliot fan too.  That was the clincher for me.  I had found my Jim Elliot.

Elisabeth died yesterday, June 15, 2015, a good and faithful servant.  May her death remind another generation of young people they need to be inspired by Elisabeth and her Jim.



It is nothing short of a transformed vision of reality that is able to see Christ as more real than the storm, love more real than hatred, meekness more real than pride, long-suffering more real than annoyance, holiness more real than sin.  



(All quotes by Elisabeth Elliot, of course.)

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