Seriously, it’s like I’m thirteen years old again. My emotions are all over the place.
One minute I’m like, I can’t wait to go back to Tanzania! I’m excited about our new ministry and learning more Swahili and amazing pineapple and my friends and I LOVE MY LIFE!
And then, two minutes later, I am freaking out. What are we thinking? What if we are not prepared for this? What if we let everybody down? How can we possibly go live in AFRICA? What if we blow it? What if we get dengue fever? What if we get robbed?
Come on, Amy. Get a grip.
When the sea is calm and all is right
When I feel Your favor flood my life
Even in the good, I’ll follow You
Even in the good, I’ll follow You
When the boat is tossed upon the waves
When I wonder if You’ll keep me safe
Even in the storms, I’ll follow You
Even in the storms, I’ll follow You
Right now, I’m in that weird place between worlds.
HOPAC recently posted pictures of the Talent Show. That was my baby for the last three years, and I yearned to be there.
During the same week, our home church started advertising their women’s retreat….in October. I yearn to be there.
I see it in my children too. One day, Grace will skip and jump and count the days until we go back. The next day, she’ll cry about leaving her grandparents and friends in America. Why are you taking me away from them?
People ask us all the time, Do you like it there? Are you excited to go back? Tanzania’s home now, right?
And I just sort of smile and laugh and say yes, because it’s way too complicated to try to describe what I feel.
I believe everything that You say You are
I believe that I have seen Your unchanging heart
In the good things and in the hardest part
I believe and I will follow You
I believe and I will follow You
The tickets are purchased. We arrive back on Tanzanian soil exactly two months from today.
When I find myself so far from home
And You lead me somewhere I don’t wanna go
Even in my death, I’ll follow You
Even in my death, I’ll follow You
When I come to end this race I’ve run
And I receive the prize that Christ has won
I will be with You in Paradise
I will be with You in Paradise
Anonymous
Darn it… Im crying again.. i love you all so so much.Even in the short time i have gotten to know you I have learned so very much. YOu have such a gift for writing as well as a genuine love for the people of Tanzania.My selfish heart wants you to stay but my love for the LORD understands why you and Gil sacrifice so much. I am often wondering and in a jealous sort of way,I wonder if we wouldnt be better off leaving all this comfort behind and living a life that is more serving to Christ.This comfortable life is such a hinderance and distraction most of the time.We have everything we(here in this country) need and desire right at our fingertips and that is dangerous and when you have everything you sometimes dont depend on the LORD as much. Although I am grateful to GOD for everything HE has provided for us i feel as though we really do not have a clue as to what real sacrifice for HIS Kingdom is.We love you and so appreciate you and we thank the LORD that we had the great priveledge of meeting your wonderful family if even for a short while 🙁 <3 Terry Scrivner
Amy Medina
Thank you, dear Terry. 🙂
Cecilie
Dear Amy, know that you are not alone in feeling this way. I spend many days feeling like this about my next year away. I am so, so glad that you are choosing to rest in His arms, and very thankful that you're willing to share it with the rest of us. It means a lot to me to have an example like you to look up to. I know I've said this before, but I'll say it again. You truly have a gift of being able to pen thoughts that the rest us can't even find the words to say out loud. Much love coming from this side of the ocean
Amy Medina
love you, girl. 🙂
Babu
This song rips at your heart. You can't listen to it (or better yet, sing it) without asking yourself if you believe it's words. The song challenges us to total obedience and a life of sustaining faith in Jesus.I appreciate the man who wrote this.
Babu