Category: Third Culture Kids Page 1 of 4

American Sprinkled with African: Conversations with Grace

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On September 3, 2024

In Third Culture Kids

My Grace is now 18, has started college, and is studying to become a middle-school history teacher. I think she’s pretty fascinating, and want more people to get to know her. So she agreed to let me interview her for my blog. Just remember that she represents only herself, not all adopted kids, or even her siblings. And as she continues to process her childhood, her answers to these questions will continue to evolve. But she gives a great snapshot of her unique life, and I know you’ll enjoy it!

What was it like to grow up Tanzanian in Tanzania by American parents?

I’m sure that when I was younger, it didn’t feel as weird as it does looking back on it now. I knew other kids that were being raised like that, so I was like, “That’s normal.” Uh, no. No, it’s not! 

As I grew up, like the last few years we were in Tanzania, I started realizing that I was treated differently by my Tanzanian classmates because I was from Tanzania, but that was the only thing that we had in common. I wasn’t fluent in Swahili; I had an accent from 10,000 miles away; I knew a lot about American culture and not Tanzanian culture. Sometimes I was subject to minor bullying. It wasn’t like I felt attacked; it was more like insults….. but that’s also because middle schoolers are awful. [And yet she wants to teach middle school!]

But also, being at Haven of Peace Academy really helped. Just because, even if they weren’t adopted, there were so many other kids like me there. There were kids who were from a different culture coming to live in Tanzania, which is kind of like my experience since I grew up in a culturally American home. Of course, I had great Tanzanian food and we listened to Tanzanian music but other than that, it was very American. So having missionary and international kids at the school made me feel that there were way many other people like me around me. 

In moving to the U.S. I realized, Whoa, there are more Black people here than I realized. So many ethnicities are counted as “Black” but there are so many different experiences represented. A Nigerian who moved to America as a college student will be living a crazy life of cultural shock. But other kids who are Nigerian and grew up here are completely different. It helped me to realize that there are so many different Black experiences in the U.S. Yes, my story is weird but that’s true of so many people in America. 

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Lament For What is Unremembered

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On February 5, 2024

In Re-Entry to America, Third Culture Kids

There they sat on the shelf of my local international food store: Nutro wafer cookies. My lungs stopped working for a moment, and it felt like one of those movie montages where the actor is suddenly flooded with a million memories. 

Lest you think these cookies are something amazing, they’re not. Imported from the United Arab Emirates and dirt cheap, they taste right around the decent level. But since most store-bought cookies in Tanzania were absurdly expensive or styrofoam-tasting, Nutros were often the best option. They showed up at every birthday party, every school Christmas feast, and in many a school lunch. 

I brought home the package of cookies, set it on the table, and watched my kids’ responses. The sharp inhale, the sudden memories of a long-ago life – they felt it too.

Leaving Tanzania brought us many losses, and we have not missed these cookies. But what is missing are the reminders of their childhoods. Like Nutro wafers. 

I recently chanced upon a digital photo album that instantly made me homesick. The pictures were nothing fancy, everything ordinary: Grace, Josiah, and Lily in Tanzania, playing soccer in our yard with Gil – a weekly, sometimes daily occurrence. The kids would pull on shin guards and cleats and run outside to our mostly un-landscaped, gigantic yard. Gil would set up goals under the eucalyptus tree, and the four of them would hoot and holler (and let’s be real, sometimes scream and cry) while the sky turned their profiles golden. A kingfisher, stray chicken, or a hedgehog might interrupt and necessitate investigation. They would play until I called them in for dinner or until the mosquitoes started biting, a little dirtier, a lot sweatier. 

Perhaps everyone is nostalgic for childhood – their own or their children’s. But what makes me most sad is that my children now have no reminders of it. 

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A Year in Review: 2023 Medina Family Update

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On December 18, 2023

In Third Culture Kids

Hey faithful blog readers,

Below is an adaption of the Christmas letter I sent out to my ministry email list. If you’re interested in news about my family, read on!

If you’ve prayed for us in 2023, I am so grateful. God is good; all the time. Every year we’ve been back in the States has gotten a little better, a little easier. Raising three teenagers (and one almost-teenager) who are working through a variety of layers of loss and identity keeps Gil and I on our knees, but we are thankful for so much in 2023: Grace’s baptism, academic improvement in a couple of kids, lots of reunions with friends from Tanzania this year, and a number of wonderful adults who are pouring into our kids’ lives. 

Here’s some updates and pictures about all of us:

Grace had an amazing year! She went to Panama on a short-term service trip, starred as Ursula in “The Little Mermaid,” made it onto “All-League First Team” in varsity basketball, helped to choreograph the church musical, works a part-time job in child care, and is taking several AP classes. She brightens everyone’s day with her sunny personality. Grace is now a senior and would love to go to Biola next year but she’s thinking she will likely go to our local community college first to save money. She wants to be a middle school English/History teacher, and of course, we think that’s a great idea! 



Josiah (now a sophomore) continues to excel in soccer, making “All-League First Team” on the Varsity team as a freshman — which is quite an accomplishment. He just turned 16 so his aspirations are now to learn to drive and get a job (so that we let him drive!). Josiah likes to pretend he’s tough but he still hugs his mom (and still greatly enjoys jumping out and scaring the living daylights out of her).
 


Lily graduated from 8th grade in May which means we have three high schoolers this year! She’s decided she is done with sports and is sticking with creating things. She took a sewing class and bought her own sewing machine this year. She also happily takes over the kitchen whenever I travel to Minnesota for work.
 
 

Johnny is now in 6th grade and is nurturing a love for music — he plays clarinet in the school band, but he also started piano lessons and is taking off. (His teacher says he is a natural at playing by ear!) He also joined the cross-country team and is pushing himself hard. He is especially proud of the fact that he broke his older brother’s 6th grade 1 mile time (under 6 minutes). This boy can run for days! He recently hit a growth spurt and is rapidly catching up to his siblings. 


Gil continues to teach high school Bible full-time and was requested by the Class of 2023 to be their commencement speaker — a testimony to his impact and influence on his students. Gil’s favorite class to teach is “Worldviews,” where he challenges students to think deeply about what they believe. 


And of course, we must acknowledge the happy presence of Mzungu the dog in our family, who can make even the grumpiest teenager smile. 

As a family, we continue to deepen our relationships at our church and in our community. The home group we host is thriving and has expanded this year. I joined the committee at church that plans short-term missions trips, and, in fact….we plan to lead one next year: Our family will be returning to Tanzania in June for three weeks (with a team from our church)!


I’m now in my fourth year serving with ReachGlobal (the organization that sent us to Tanzania). I am on the Engage Team, which means I help to interview, onboard, and train new cross-cultural workers. I was promoted to Associate Director this year and have enjoyed the challenge of new and different responsibilities. I work remotely most of the time but travel to Minnesota several times a year for interviewing and training events.

I also have had several additional speaking events this year–to help train short-term teams in cross-cultural sensitivity, to train church missions leaders in creating a missions culture, and even to teach a weekend retreat on anxiety for teen girls.

My job is a support-raising position, meaning I have to raise all the funds needed for my salary, benefits, and travel expenses. I haven’t yet met my fundraising goals for 2023, so if you would be interested in becoming a monthly partner or making an end-of-year gift, please click here to make a donation. It’s always tax deductible.

If you are interested in joining my ministry email list, please let me know at contactamy@amy-medina.com. (This is different from subscribing to this blog by email.)

Thank you for reading this post, and so many others! Your comments and emails in response to my articles are what keep me writing. I am so grateful to each of you!

By grace,
Amy

Three Years In

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On March 23, 2023

In Re-Entry to America, Third Culture Kids

I can’t get rid of a faded brown pair of socks that I got in Arusha at language school in 2016. Arusha is much colder than Dar es Salaam (where I hardly ever wore socks), so I bought them at an open-air market. 

I’m not sure why I even brought these socks back to the States with me, except that we left with five days’ notice, so not all my packing decisions made sense. I knew it would be sock-weather in California in March. Maybe I thought the pandemic would make socks scarce. 

In three years, I haven’t worn them. But I can’t get rid of them. 

Gil is not as sentimental as me. I recently found his Tevas in the trash, his favorite ones, the ones he had re-soled on a Dar es Salaam street corner – the Maasai way, with old tires. Which meant that he walked with tire tread marks instead of shoe prints. I fished them out of the trash and protested loudly but they were indeed kind of gross. So I took a picture instead. Still, a piece of my heart went into the trash with them.

It’s been three years this month. 

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Send Their Letters Back

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On May 24, 2022

In Liberia, Re-Entry to America, Third Culture Kids

How does a 13-year-old girl process the destruction of the home she loves? In 8th grade, I watched helplessly from a distance as I heard reports of civil war destroying Liberia, the country that defined my childhood.

My expectation of returning to Liberia for my high school years slowly evaporated over the spring of 1990. As our mission organization scrambled to find a new assignment for us, my life skewed off in a direction that felt darker, unsteady, unsure. 

I worked through that grief over many years, but recently an unexpected gift from Beth, a long-ago friend, helped me more clearly process it. This missionary-kid friend from my years in Liberia wrote to tell me that she had found the letters I had written her during our 8th grade year. Would I like them back? 

Not long after, the packet arrived in the mail, and my girls studied my letters with fascination. What are these? they wondered, as if looking at ancient relics. There was a time before the internet, I told them with exasperation. People used paper. 

To be honest, I didn’t expect to find much value in my letters. So I was surprised by how meaningful it was to read them again. 

Interspersed in the drivel about vacations and teachers were windows into my inner life. I see the “between two worlds” struggle I was experiencing, common for third-culture kids, but not something I could keenly express until I was much older. 

We also get to go to Great America, a huge roller coaster park. Another good thing about this school is we get electives. I am taking handbells and drama. They are really fun. But I would give all this up for the beach, you, Carolyn, Feme, and the rest of our class.

And then there are the parts about the upheaval descending on our lives.

Tell me what happened in the coo! (or however you spell it). I hope it’s over by the time you get this letter. Has it rained a lot this year? How is ELWA? How was your Christmas vacation? We went to Disneyland!

Coups aren’t supposed to be in the experience of 13-year-olds, which explains why I couldn’t spell it, and why it’s in the same paragraph about the weather and Disneyland. 

The coup turned into a civil war. It wasn’t over by the time Beth got this letter. In fact, it wasn’t over for another 15 years. 

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