Category: Other Page 34 of 181

Children Are No Longer for Sale In Uganda

By

On June 3, 2016

In Other

Imagine this:

Wealthy Saudi Arabian families hear about the 400,000 children languishing in foster care in the United States, and feel a deep desire to help with this crisis.  However, these Saudi families don’t have the time to go through foster parent training and don’t want to spend large amounts of time in the U.S. They do, however, have lots of money, and are able to find lawyers to find loopholes in American laws to make this happen.

Unfortunately, the Saudi families can’t actually adopt the children immediately according to US law.  So instead, they have the courts grant them guardianship.  Then they take the kids back to Saudi Arabia and adopt them there.  Some of the kids haven’t even been released for adoption– one day, they should have been reunited with their birthparents.  But the adoptive families are sure they are giving them a better life, so it will all be okay.

In fact, these adoptions become so popular in Saudi Arabia that there aren’t enough American kids in foster care to go around.  So the lawyers hire “facilitators” to go out and “find” children in the poor areas who might like to experience a “foreign exchange program” in Saudi Arabia for a few years.   Lots of poor American parents sign up.  After all, life with a fabulously wealthy Saudi family has got to be better than life in the ghetto.  The parents just don’t realize they will never see their kids again.

If such a scenario would infuriate you; if you would demand the end of such a monstrosity, then that’s good.  You should feel that way.



But this is exactly what’s been happening in Uganda for the past few years.

Uganda has never had an official international adoption program.  The law was extremely clear:  any non-Ugandan who wanted to adopt must foster the child for three years–in Uganda–before the adoption could be finalized.

But Africa has been popular in the adoption world for the last two decades.  And since Liberia’s program closed (because of corruption), and Congo’s program closed (because of corruption), and Ethiopia’s program massively slowed down (because of corruption), agencies were eager to find a way to get kids adopted out of Uganda.

Unfortunately, adoption agencies just had that nasty 3-year residency law to deal with.  So, they found some lawyers who decided they could “make” a way (for the right price, of course) for Americans to bring children home from Uganda.  Sure, the law said that anyone who adopted a child had to live in Uganda for three years, but the law did not say that a prospective legal guardian had to live in the country at all!  Ah ha!   And since the United States does not require a child to be actually adopted before they move to the U.S., (because why would that be important???) these Ugandan children could enter America with their “legal guardians” and get their adoptions finalized in the States.  Bingo!  Another African country in the adoption bag.

But if orphans are getting rescued, does it really matter how it happens?

If you read my series on corruption in international adoption, you can already picture what happened next.  Orphanages, often funded by adoption agencies, sprung up by thehundreds all over Uganda.  Parents in poverty realized that sending their kids to an orphanage was a good way to get them three meals a day and free education.  And all of a sudden, thousands of kids were unnecessarily separated from their families.  Sometimes the families knew their kids would be adopted, but didn’t feel they had any other choice.  Other times, the kids were trafficked.  Papers were falsified.  Everyone was lied to.  But money was the common denominator.

Behind the scenes, groups of children’s advocates have been working.  And just last week, Uganda’s president signed an amendment to the adoption law.  The loophole is now closed.  Legal guardianships can only be granted to Ugandan citizens. 

Friends, this is a win!  



This is a win for Uganda.

The government has taken back control of adoption in their country–exactly as it should be.  No longer will the agencies and the orphanages be accountable only to themselves.  A centralized authority will regulate adoption and child protection. Corruption should dramatically decrease, and that’s a benefit for everyone, especially the poor.



This is a win for the kids in orphanages.

No longer is there a financial incentive for orphanages to fill up their beds.  No longer is there a “demand” for adoptable children which unnecessarily separates kids from families.  Instead, there is space for ministries to find alternative care for needy children, like foster care, assistance for those in poverty, and even support for parents of kids with disabilities.

This is a win for Ugandan families who want to adopt.  

Guess what?  This is a growing movement in Uganda!  In fact, I’ve heard that there is now a waiting list of Ugandan families who want to adopt a baby.  No longer will their desires be overshadowed by foreign agencies with lots of money who need to fill their demand.

This is a win for foreigners who want to adopt.  

Though the new amendment closes the “guardianship” loophole (which should have never been a thing in the first place), it also majorly reduces the amount of time it takes for a foreigner to legally adopt a Ugandan child–from three years to one year.  True, requiring a year of residency essentially ends international adoption.  Foreigners can still adopt–but only if they are residents, so this new amendment makes it significantly easier for them.  The best part is that this almost entirely dismisses the need for adoption agencies, cutting off almost all of the money flow, which should greatly encourage ethical adoptions.

In addition, there is a small provision in the law for the judge to make exceptions in extreme circumstances.  I know of children adopted from Uganda who had medical conditions that would have meant certain death if they had stayed behind.  This provision in the law should still allow children like this to find a new life in America.

Uganda is now on track to becoming a member of the Hague Adoption Convention.  Woohoo!

As I’ve said before, let me assure you that I am not casting judgment on any family who has brought home a Ugandan child.  Most of the time, adoptive parents are one hundred percent trusting their agencies, who probably never explained to them the reality of Ugandan law.  Some did adopt their kids the right way.  And certainly there are many true Ugandan orphans who have now found forever families.  Even in the corruption, God can bring out good.  But with this new law, light has been shone onto the dark side of Ugandan adoption.  It is a reason to celebrate!



This is a win for Uganda, its children, and for ethical international adoption everywhere!  Well done, Uganda!

My Son Taught Me About Privilege Yesterday

By

On May 29, 2016

In Other

This was my boy yesterday morning when he ran his first 5K.  He is 8 years old and probably only weighs 40 pounds.  That’s 40 pounds of muscle with a few bones stuck in.  God made him an athlete, and he made him fast.

Josiah won second place in his age category, with a time of almost exactly 23 minutes.  

Josiah’s real love is soccer, but he has been training in track this school term.  However, he had never run such a long distance before, so we weren’t really sure what to expect.  Just have fun, we told him.  Let’s see what you can do.  

I was so proud of him, and even got a little teary when he roared across the finish line.  But because of the different start times, I didn’t really realize how well he had done until we went online to see the stats last night.  

There were 84 participants.  Only two were younger than Josiah.  He placed sixth out of 84 people.

Then I started thinking about all these top runners.  James?  Also adopted from Tanzania.  Alidi, Moses, and Rashid?  All boys from a slum across the road from HOPAC.  A group of men from the HOPAC community have been deeply investing in these three boys (and others) for years now, training them in both sports and the gospel.

I thought about James and Josiah and what their lives would be like right now if they had not been plucked out of that orphanage (both boys from the same one!).  I thought about Alidi, Moses, and Rashid, and how the annual 5K has become such a bright spot in a life of poverty.   

And then I thought about the millions of others like them, all across Tanzania and the world, who will never get this chance.  Even Alidi, whose favorite day of the year is probably the 5K, has to content himself with running at a small community race, instead of an all-state event in front of college recruiters.  

How many other young boys and girls are out there, DNA brimming with Olympic athleticism, or Ivy-League intelligence, or musical genius?  Yet they’ll never have a real soccer ball, or a classroom with less than 100 students in it, or a piano to practice.  

And it hit me that one of the (many) privileges of being wealthy is the ability to see my children find their potential.  And have a shot at reaching it.  

It makes me wonder how many millions of those in poverty are ignored, oppressed, or spat upon, when all they really need is a chance.  Or how often I have taken advantage of my wealth and opportunity and forgotten what a what a huge privilege my life really is.

I’ve resolved not to forget.  Or waste it.   

Pizza Hut is Definitely Worth Blogging About

By

On May 24, 2016

In Other

In America, I was not a Pizza Hut fan.  I would always choose Round Table or Papa John’s….or almost any other pizza place over Pizza Hut.

But then I lived in Dar es Salaam for 12 years, and experienced ketchup used as pizza sauce, hot dogs as a topping instead of sausage, and whole olives–pit and all, rolling around on the top of my pizza.  As the years went on, the pizza (at some places) has improved, but it’s still the European, brick-oven variety, which means thin crust, thin cheese, and just….thin.

I know.  I deserve a lot of sympathy.  Life is hard.

So you can imagine how we all rejoiced to know that Pizza Hut would be opening in Dar es Salaam.

It takes us an hour to get there, unless it’s rush hour–then it’s two hours.  But who wouldn’t travel to the ends of the earth for Pizza Hut?

But….considering we do have a few other priorities in life (I know, hard to imagine), we didn’t make it out there until a week ago.  We envied our friends who managed to get there before us, and we always had the same question,

“Does it taste like the real thing?”

They assured us that it did, and when we finally got a chance to test it ourselves, we wholeheartedly agreed.  Chewy, greasy, totally processed and full of preservatives.  It was glorious.

As you can see, the menu does reflect a bit of the local culture.  There are no pork products because Dar is a majority Muslim city.  “Macon” is a bacon substitute made out of mutton.  I’m guessing that most Americans have no idea what paneer is, or maybe even tandoori chicken.  And even though we love both paneer and tandoori chicken, we’ll never be ordering it on pizza.  As far as we’re concerned, the only thing we’re interested in is pepperoni.

Ah, pepperoni pizza, how I’ve missed you.  Hot dogs can just never substitute.

To the Christians: Is Love Really All You Need?

By

On May 19, 2016

In Other

If you had a daughter who was anorexic, what would you do?  Would you let her starve herself to death?  Or would you do absolutely anything to get her healthy again, even if it meant hospitalizing her against her will?

If you had a suicidal friend, would you stand by and watch while he jumped?  Would you think, “Well, I guess this is what he wants, so it must be the best choice for him?”  Or would you wrestle him to the ground if you had to?

What does it mean to love?

Society tells us that love means unconditional acceptance.  Love means tolerance, listening, empathy.  And it means never telling anyone they are wrong.  

Our culture has constructed a new moral law:  Treat others as they want to be treated.  There’s even a name for it:  The Platinum Rule–because it is said to be superior to the Golden Rule.

Treat others as they want to be treated.  Is that love?

But how far does that go?  Do we treat the anorexic or suicidal person the way they want to be treated?  It’s obvious that we do not.  But one could argue that such people are mentally ill.  Yet even our categories of mental illness are changing on a daily basis.

My last post was an apology to non-Christians for our often stark absence of love.  I’ve seen it way too often–on the internet, in our priorities, in how we choose to present ourselves to the world.  But the tricky part is that Christians must define love according to the Bible, not according to our culture.

When Jesus got down in the dirt with the adulterous woman, he stopped those trying to punish her, and instead treated her with kindness and compassion.  But he didn’t end there.  Go and sin no more, he told her.

And that’s where Christians tend to swing between two sides of the pendulum.  They choose the compassion, or they choose the judgment.  Yet to follow in Jesus’ steps, we must have both.

As society continues its plunge into relativism and obsession with feelings, Christians will be more and more despised for our insistence that God’s standard is the best.  Our new reputation as “haters” is difficult to swallow, especially since American Christians have long since enjoyed the reputation as “nice” and “respectable.”  It’s hard to give that up.  The temptation will be to retreat into a cotton candy version of love, which claims that we all know what’s best for ourselves so the best way to love is to never criticize another’s choices.

If we live according to a biblical worldview, then we know that every person on earth is mentally ill.  We might not be anorexic or suicidal, but we all have skewed self-perceptions of ourselves or reality.  So which is more loving–to treat people the way they want to be treated and allow them to self-destruct, or to do everything we can to stop them in their tracks?

I believe that an all-powerful, all-seeing, all-knowing God not only exists, but communicates with us.  I believe that he has set a moral standard for all people, that none of us can meet that standard, but that he will hold us accountable for it.  I believe in a literal heaven and hell.  I believe that Jesus’ death and resurrection opened the only way for me to know God and one day live with God.

If I really, truly believe this, and would stake my life on it, then would it be loving for me to shut up and keep it private?  Would it be loving for me to tell people that they can live their lives any way they choose and God will be okay with it?  Let us not forget that mercy and justice met at the cross.  We cannot preach the cross without including both.  Anything less is to cheapen Jesus’ sacrifice.

So what is love?  If I am certain the Bible is true, if I am confident that it is life-giving, life-transforming, and the greatest treasure on earth, do I let the people around me careen off a cliff without warning them?

The problem is that for far too long, the church has spewed out judgment without compassion.  Justice without mercy.  Many times, we have rightly earned the reputation of being hateful.  But in our quest to love, let’s make sure that we define it correctly.  If we are going to be despised, let’s make sure it’s for the right reasons.

How does the Bible define love?  Love is patient and kind.  Love is sacrificial.  Love initiates relationships.  Love is the first person to help the neighbor in crisis.  Love rearranges her schedule to help the friend.  Love opens her arms to the refugee, the foster child, the single mom, the transgender teen.  Love is hospitable; love is generous with her time, her talents, her finances.  Love humbly remembers that she too is recovering from mental illness.  She gets down in the dirt with those who are hurting.  But when she does,

Love also speaks the Truth.

————————————


As we navigate these culturally tricky times, may I strongly encourage every thinking Christian (or non-Christian) to read Saving Leonardo (at least the first half) and Finding Truth by Nancy Pearcey.  If you are seeking tools to thoughtfully, winsomely engage others in rational discussion about our changing culture, these are incredible resources.  They will change your thinking and your life.

If You are Not a Christian, Please Accept This Apology

By

On May 17, 2016

In Other

“Wow, I just changed my strongly held opinion on that issue because of a harsh comment by a stranger on the internet.”

…..said absolutely no one in the history of the universe.



If you do not consider yourself a Christian, this is for you.  Please let me take this opportunity to apologize to you on behalf of Christians everywhere.  Because sometimes, I am mortified to identify myself as one.

I don’t know who these Christians are who love to drop critical comments on internet articles, but they are not me.  And I’m not really sure what exactly they are trying to accomplish when they post such harsh, mean-spirited words.

Do they really think that people are going to care what “God says” about a particular issue, if their readers don’t believe in God?  Do they really think that saying anything in a mean, critical way is going to attract anyone to Jesus Christ?

Sometimes I want to just despair.  Or throw up.

Many times, Christians deserve the reputation of being judgmental, self-righteous prigs.  We have brought that upon ourselves.  We are far too concerned about our needs, our rights, and our safety, and we find it much easier to hold up a picket sign, boycott a company, or leave nasty comment on the internet than to actually get out there and love people.

I must admit that I’m totally perplexed.  Christians say we are followers of Jesus, yet Jesus himself specialized in compassion.  Jesus’ harshest, most condemning words?  They were reserved for the self-righteous religious leaders who loaded people up with legalistic rules.  But the people that society cast out?  Jesus ran to them.  Those who were considered “untouchable?”  Jesus treated them with dignity and respect.  Women, prostitutes, the handicapped, gluttons, drunkards?  Those were his friends.

If you are disgusted with Christians, I don’t blame you.  Jesus said our job is to help hurting people, and sometimes it seems like the best we can do it throw Bible verses at them.  Instead of listening, we criticize.  Instead of compassion, we boycott.  If that’s all you see, why on earth would you be attracted to Jesus?

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I believe there are many Christians out there who are doing just that–living sacrificial lives, loving unconditionally, and being excellent neighbors and co-workers.  Many are my friends.  But unfortunately, they don’t get the attention.  The boycotters and the internet trolls do.

For this, I apologize.  I have no idea why those who bear the name of Jesus could ever think that being mean-spirited and unkind would ever be God’s will for their lives.

However, I realize that I can’t apologize for everything Christians say or do.  You and I are not going to agree on everything.  Christians believe the Bible should be the standard of morality, and that’s going to make some people hate us no matter how we act.  If we’re really living what we believe, then our faith can’t just be something “private” that we don’t talk about.  I hope that there is still room in our society for honest, rational discussion.  But I hope that Christians would pursue the reputation of being kind, gracious, and respectful, even if others disagree with what we have to say.  I hope you might think, Her views seem so wrong, but I just can’t get over how kind she is.  



So will you do me a favor and try to ignore the mean ones?  They don’t represent all of us.  They definitely don’t represent Jesus.  Everyone does need a little Grace in their lives.  I hope that’s what you’ll find here.  I hope that’s what you’ll find in the next Christian you meet.

Page 34 of 181

Previous

Next

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén

Verified by MonsterInsights