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You Can Lock Up a Few Evil People, but You Can’t Lock Up Everyone

photo by Gil Medina

Sometimes I click on a link out of morbid curiosity.  9 Much-Needed Reminders That Humans are Inherently Good.  Seriously?  I thought.  I’ve got to read this.

The article assures us that even though terrible things are happening in the world, we can take heart because humans are wired for empathy, kindness, unselfishness, romance, and hugs.  And dogs like us, so we must be pretty amazing.

Well, that’s reassuring.

I sigh and think, Only in America.  I guarantee that if you ask anyone in Rwanda, Cambodia, Syria, Iraq, Iran, Venezuela, North Korea, or South Sudan if humans are inherently good, they’ll laugh in your face.  Except maybe not because they are too busy crying, running for their lives, or languishing in prison.

I know it feels good to believe in the goodness of humanity.  And of course, humans are capable of incredible acts of self-sacrifice, courage, and kindness, and it is exemplary to aspire to those ideals.  We were made in the image of God, and vestiges of Eden–of who we were meant to be–are still evident in our friendships, our parenting, our service.

But the belief that mankind is inherently good?  Really?  How many acts of terrorism, genocide, child slavery, albino murders, or rape does our world need to experience before we abandon that belief?

The problem is that we keep thinking that everything would be okay if we could just stop the bad people.  We conveniently forget that we are bad people too.  



Germans stood by passively while the ashes of six million Jews floated over their heads.  Rwandans picked up machetes and hacked to death the neighbors they had lived by for generations.  Freed American slaves used their freedom to colonize Liberia and oppress the indigenous people.

That’s them, we think.  Not me.  I would never do that.  Sure, it’s easy to believe I am a decent person when my stomach is full, the electricity is working, and my children are healthy.  But all I have to do is look at myself when I’ve lost a night of sleep or have a bad headache, and that beast inside me rises from its slumber and turns me into a person I don’t want to be.  I wonder sometimes, what would that beast look like if I lived under the shadow of violence, if I couldn’t feed my children, if terror had scraped away my desire for self-sacrifice?  Or what if a powerful but evil leader promised to make all my problems go away?  What would I be capable of?

I do believe that it is healing and inspiring to look for the good and the beautiful in people and in this world.  It’s there.  But believing that somehow the goodness of humanity will one day rise up and save us all?  Just not going to happen.  You can lock up a few evil people, but you can’t lock up everyone.  

We are presented with three options:  suicide, hope in humanity, or hope in God.  Everyone has that choice, and everyone chooses.  There are no other options.

photo by Gil Medina

Anarchy is Loosed Upon the World

Turning and turning in the widening gyre

The falcon cannot hear the falconer;

Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;

Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,

The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere

The ceremony of innocence is drowned;

The best lack all conviction, while the worst 

Are full of passionate intensity.

William Butler Yeats, 1919

We watch the news with horror.  We can’t keep up with the tragedy.  It’s too much, too much.  Too much pain; too much devastation.

The ceremony of innocence is drowned.

We can’t change our profile pictures fast enough before the next tragedy occurs.  Nazarite?  Paris?  Orlando?  Baghdad?  Istanbul?  Gorilla?  Black lives matter?  or is it Blue lives?  There are two many things to care about; too many things that tear at our hearts and give us whiplash from trying so hard to keep up.  Sometimes it’s easier to just pull the covers over our heads.

The blood-dimmed tide is loosed.

And all of those things don’t even scratch the surface of the problems within the four walls of our own personal universe–a child’s bad choices, money that won’t stretch, conflicts between two that share the same space, that strange lump, that broken washing machine–or those problems within the confines of our own minds–that secret sin, that devastating fear, that sense of failure that hangs on like a bad cough.

It’s hard enough facing the problems in our own small spaces; it seems too much to face the problems out there.  Especially when the problems out there start creeping into our own space like termites that eat through the walls.

Yet, there is nothing new under the sun.  Yeats’ poem was written after World War I–before Hitler murdered six million, before the atomic bombs, before Stalin starved seven million, before Pol Pot slaughtered two million, before Rwandans axed one million of their neighbors, before, before, before.

Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world.  And yet after, it only got worse.

There is nothing new under the sun.  But for two centuries, some Americans–some–were given the gift of a life that was different than the trajectory of history.  A life that really was peaceful and prosperous and free.  The Great American experiment worked for a lot of people, for a long time.  But for those of us who grew up in that American Dream, who rode our bikes with abandon down our streets, where violence, racism, and poverty were “out there” for other people–not for us–that Dream seemed as permanent as the sturdy oak trees in our front yards.  There was no reason to question whether it would last.

What we didn’t realize, growing up in that Dream World, is how unique our experience was–in the world, in history, even in much of America.  Our history classes focused on “western civilization”…which seemed to find its pinnacle in the life we were living right now.  We had reached the top, and there was no reason to believe that we would fall from it.

Or so we thought.

Really though, has the world actually gotten worse?  Or just our world?  

I don’t think the world is getting worse.  I just think my American Dream generation is coming to grips with the reality of life.  That blip on the screen that was the American Dream was really just an illusion, for a time covering up the deeper, sinister parts of human nature….in our society, and in ourselves.

Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold.

And here we are now.  Facing terribly disturbing leadership in our own country, facing deep fissures in our unity that will no longer allow to be plastered over, facing the loss of our religious freedom, facing dire financial collapse, facing outside threats to our safety like circling hyenas.

Facing what the rest of the world has always faced.  We can watch a lot of sitcoms; we can go on happy vacations; we can eat lots of good food; we can enjoy the best of America, but we can no longer tell ourselves that everything will be okay.

How do we then live?

We swallow the red pill and see the Matrix for what it really is.  We go backstage at Disneyland and see where they dump the trash.  Many, of course, have lived there all along.  We acknowledge how living only in our Dream World has hurt them; how we have failed to listen to their pleas.  We repent of our trust in that world to bring us happiness.  

There is still a way to find joy, of course.  We need not live our lives under a storm cloud.  Babies are born and marriages are celebrated even in times of war.  Sunsets fill our souls and the stars give us strength.  Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion is the best line in “Steel Magnolias.”  Brokenhearted joy is what John Piper calls it.  We bravely face the wretchedness in ourselves and in our society–even while we watch it crumble–but we remember that we hold the true source of Hope.  

The Christian life was meant to be lived in the widening gyre.  It’s what we were created for.  It’s what we are called to do.  It’s what Jesus meant when he said to pick up our cross and follow him, why he told us that his peace is not the same as what the world gives, why he said that the most important thing is to abide in him.  It’s why he told us that we would have trouble in this world, but to take heart because he has overcome it.

Things fall apart, but we do hear the falconer.  As we are faced with this new reality, which really is just peeling back the veil and seeing reality as it has always been, let us remember that we do hear the falconer.

This July 4th, I’m Thankful For My Blue Passport

We have some good friends here who are citizens of Zimbabwe, a country to the south of Tanzania.  Our friends are of European decent, whose ancestors colonized Zimbabwe generations ago.

I am also of European decent, and my ancestors colonized north America generations ago.  However, my colonizing ancestors brought with them European diseases that wiped out 90% of the native American population, whereas the colonizing ancestors of my Zimbabwean friends were held in check by African diseases.  Which meant that even though their ancestors established a government in a foreign land (just like in North America), they never became the majority population.  (Okay, so I know it’s not actually that simple and is certainly quite ugly, but the comparison is interesting.)

Our Zimbabwean friends, like us from America, bear no responsibility for their ancestors’ choices, and yet reap the consequences, whether good or bad.  Unfortunately, Zimbabwe has now been ruled by a tyrant for almost 4 decades, and the country that used to be called “the breadbasket of Africa” has had a complete economic collapse.  So our friends, descended from ancestors much like our own, are left with citizenship from a country that they dearly love, but has nothing left to offer them.  Their children have no hope of attending university or finding jobs in their own country.   They are, in many ways, exiles.  How differently their story of colonialism has ended.

We celebrated the 4th of July yesterday at a friend’s house who threw a big bash and invited people of any nationality.  It felt normal, though, to celebrate America’s independence with non-Americans, since that’s what America has always been about.  And even though the United States still has deep-seated problems with racism and immigration, it has still been the most open country in the world to outsiders.   Every year, even though only several students in HOPAC’s graduating class are American, the majority of our students attend university in the States.  America consistently seeks after international students and offers them the best scholarships–hands down.  I’ve sat in the U.S. embassy in Tanzania and listened to visa interviews.  Everyone wants to go to America.  And a lot of the time, America says yes.

Living here has helped me to have a greater appreciation of my blue American passport.  Unlike many countries in the world, I was able to acquire a passport with no trouble at all.  Unlike other countries, my country allows me to freely come and go.  By giving my children that blue passport, my girls will be given the opportunity to go to college (unlike many in Pakistan or Afghanistan); my sons will not be automatically conscripted into the military (unlike Israel, South Korea, or dozens of others).

It was a fabulous party, but I felt sad yesterday, did you?  These days, it’s hard to know what’s in store for our country.  Could we be heading in the same direction as Zimbabwe?  Living overseas has often increased my frustration with America, but also my appreciation.  It’s never been perfect, but we sure have a whole lot more than most of the world–in opportunity, freedom, and possessions.  I am apprehensive for America’s future.  But for now, I’m still thankful for that blue passport.

A kid with a kid.  

Gil with one of the pastors in our program.
Bet you didn’t drink out of coconuts at your 4th of July celebration.

Missionaries are supposed to suffer….So am I allowed to buy an air conditioner?

It was a very exciting email.  The editor of A Life Overseas had contacted me, asking me to be a monthly contributor to their missions website.  I had previously had two guest posts published on this site, but I didn’t see myself as an equal to the other writers, many of whom have published books.  So it was indeed an honor to be asked.  And now my name is there–listed with all those other wonderful missions writers.

So, of course, I’ll be sharing my “A Life Overseas” posts with you, my favorite readers, since it is your encouragement that keeps me writing.  The posts for this site are aimed at overseas Christian workers, but there’s often a lot there for anyone.  So….[drum roll]….Presenting my first official post as a monthly contributor to “A Life Overseas!”

Missionaries are supposed to suffer….So am I allowed to buy an air conditioner? 

“When you’re standing there on the center of that church stage, surrounded by hundreds of people praying for you, plane tickets in hand, earthly possessions packed into bags exactly 49.9 pounds each, you feel ready to suffer.  Yes!  I am ready to abandon it all!


And then you arrive in your long-awaited country and you realize that in order to host the youth group, you’re going to need a big living room.  And in order to get the translation work done, you need electricity, which means you need a generator.  And in order to learn the language, you’ll need to hire someone to wash your dishes and help with childcare.

Suddenly, you find yourself living in a bigger house than you lived in your home country, but you are ashamed to put pictures of it on Facebook.  You don’t want to admit to your supporters that you spent $1000 on a generator, and heaven forbid people find out that you aren’t doing your own ironing.

Apparently, if you suffer more, you are a better missionary.  Or more godly.  Probably both.”

Click hereto read the whole article.  

Medina Life, March through June

This term in 4th grade, Grace learned about ancient Greece.
Grade 4 on Greek Day
Josiah’s 2nd grade assembly performing “You Make Me Brave”…and we all cried.

These boys….they adore each other!  (Okay, 95% of the time, but that’s pretty good.)
Lily’s first grade class learned about the Masai this term.

Lily competing in the Bible verse celebration.
Me at the Haven of Peace Academy Board retreat.  Did I ever tell you I’m on the HOPAC board?  Well, I am.  It takes up a good chunk of time, and it’s really important, but doesn’t exactly generate exciting blog posts.  Or exciting blog pictures, for that matter.  
My little Narnian frozen statue.  Grace was thrilled to be a part of “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe” last month.
Preparing for the great battle against the White Witch.
Running:  The Medina kids all ran this term!  Grace and Josiah both were on the track team, they both ran the 5K and participated in school track days and an inter-school meet.  Lily ran on sports day, and Johnny joined her for the 1K.  We’ve got runners in this family!

Grace was pretty excited about the water station during the 5K.
Josiah, of course, blew us all away.   He’s got a big ol’ collection of ribbons now.  
Delicia Roberson, the beloved music teacher of all my kids, got married.  She had one of the most fun weddings I’ve ever attended, and it was so special that my girls got to be there too.

The HOPAC community at Delicia’s wedding…we kind of took over!
Tag rugby.  Someone needs to come over here and teach my son how to play football so he can try to be American.  
Sports Day.  Go Green House! 

HOPAC graduation:  I got to be an “auntie” in this girl’s life the last few years.  
Last Thursday, on HOPAC’s last day of school.  
Our awesome teammates (and friends), Mark and Alyssa, just left for a six-month home assignment.  We are on our own in the training program until they get back.  We will sure miss them!

Many thanks to Abi Snyder and Rebecca Laarman, who took a lot of these pictures.  

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