Author: Amy Medina Page 82 of 233

When Life Feels Like Drudgery

Some days, it’s hard to get going in the morning when I am not looking forward to anything I have to do that day.  Drudgery, I think to myself.  

Maybe it’s the weather these days.  I feel like a sticky, slimy slug most of the time.  Whoever invented the word sluggish must have lived in Dar es Salaam in January.

Maybe it’s because the particular set of tasks assigned to me right now are not really my first choice in life.  I am in currently in charge of slogging through the paperwork to process our mission personnel’s visas.  On our ministry team, I am responsible for accounting and marketing.  Both of which are not my strengths, and almost not even my weaknesses.

Of course, just trying to live in a developing country doesn’t help.  It can take half a day to find the right-size light bulb.  The electricity doesn’t always work.  The roads don’t always work.  The water doesn’t always work.  All my best laid plans for productivity often go to waste.

Some days, I just feel so tired.  I give up.  You win, World.  Congratulations.  Just let me lie on the floor in peace.

But I do get up.

This I call to mind:  Faithfulness in drudgery is what faithfulness is all about.  Most of life is drudgery, isn’t it?  The messes, the commute, the weeds that keep growing, the bellies that need feeding, the clothes that need washing.

But the messes and the crying children and the electricity problems are just the individual puzzle pieces.  Alone, they seem endless and pointless.  But when I step back and give myself perspective, I remind myself that the visa applications and the search for working copy machines are part of a wider, much more glorious picture of what God is using us to do in Tanzania.  When I step back, I see that the cooking and the homework and the messes are part of the much more glorious picture of what God is doing in our family.

Every trudging step has meaning.

There will be an end, and there always is a point.

Wherever you are, be all there.  Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God. (Jim Elliot)

This life is the will of God for me right now.  So here’s to living to the hilt.

And Now She’s Ten.

This girl……this girl made me a Mommy.  And now she’s blessed us with her sunshine for 10 years.  

Ten is a great age.  Self-doubt hasn’t hit her yet; she believes she can do anything without self-consciousness.  Her friends are the same; they love each other and cheer for each other without competition.  She loves her siblings, she loves sports and reading and crafts and trying out just about anything.  She can actually help me in the kitchen without being a liability.  She is a peace-maker and an includer.  She still holds my hand.  It’s pretty amazing that I get the privilege of being her mom.  

Photo credit for both of the above:  Rebecca Laarman

We celebrated yesterday with her friends.  They made their own picture frames, their own pizza, and their own ice cream sundaes.  (Can you tell Grace is all about making things?)  They made a huge noise and a huge mess but it was a party to remember.  But I think my favorite part was when a Korean friend brought an entire plate of sushi rolls and all the girls scarfed them down.  True Third-Culture Kids.  

Sometimes Heaven Looks Like This…But Just a Little Bit

The week after Christmas is probably our favorite week of
the year. 

Just about the time when we can’t stand the heat and
humidity any longer, we head to the mountains of Lushoto with our best
friends.  It’s tradition now; we’ve done
it almost every year we’ve lived in Tanzania. 

There’s clean, cool air, long, deep conversations, obsessive
board game-playing, soccer, wiffle ball, Kindle reading, and no responsibilities
of cooking and cleaning.  The kids play
all day together outdoors, creating imaginary worlds and new games and getting
fabulously dirty. 

It’s a little piece of heaven.  Except, this year we were reminded that it’s
not actually Heaven, when one of the teens came down with Typhoid, and one family’s
room was robbed of their valuables on New Year’s Eve.  So we all left a little bit sad, because even
when we try to set up the Perfect Week, and even when we all really do have a
great time, the brokenness of this world still gets in the way. 

On the way back down the mountain, we listened to the audio
book of The Last Battle, our favorite Narnia book and perhaps, one of the greatest
books ever written.  It was perfect
timing.

“'[T]hat was not the real Narnia,” [said the Lord
Digory].  ‘That had a beginning and an
end.  It was only a shadow or a copy of
the real Narnia, which has always been here and always will be here:  just as our own world is only a shadow or
copy of something in Aslan’s real world.’


It was the unicorn who summed up what everyone was
feeling.  He stamped his right fore-hoof
on the ground…and cried:

‘I have come home at last! 
This is my real country!  I belong
here.  This is the land I have been
looking for all my life, though I never knew it till now.  The reason why we loved the old Narnia is
that it sometimes looked a little like this. 
Come further up, come further in!’”

Yes, we love our Decembers in the mountains of Lushoto
because it looks and feels a little like Heaven.  But the brokenness reminds us that it’s
not.  So even during great weeks like this one, we remember we are still in the Shadowlands.  We look forward with
anticipation to Aslan’s real world.  

It’s really not that cold….we just like to pretend.

Our New Year’s birthday girl….more about her later.

Dear Mom and Dad, If I Suffered, It Was Worth It

ELWA Mission Station in Liberia, source unknown

Dear Mom and Dad,

Last week I read an article called “Should the Children Suffer?”  It’s about a missionary father’s struggle to trust God with the suffering his children are experiencing on the mission field.

In 1982, you took my younger brother and me to west Africa.  In the months preceding that move, I remember listening to you and my Gram–your mother–weeping loudly as you tried to get her to understand that decision.  Gram was not only devastated, she was angry.  And she even threatened to hire a lawyer to try to get custody of Paul and me.  Another grandparent fretted out loud over our deprived childhoods.

Some people would probably say that Paul and I suffered.

Paul got Hepatitis in Liberia. I got amoebic dysentery in Kenya.  Once we found a green mamba in our garage.  Twice, we lost almost all of our possessions due to war and evacuation.  In Ethiopia in 1991, there wasn’t much to eat.  We never went hungry, but we all got skinnier.  I went to boarding school at age 13.   Before college, I attended six different schools in four different countries.  I made friends and lost them more times than I could count.  I grew up never really knowing my cousins.  When we finally moved back to the States, Paul was bullied.  I was weird.  We were completely oblivious to styles and trends and TV shows.  I struggled deeply to figure out where I belonged.

Rift Valley Academy in Kenya, 9th grade, Swala Dorm

Was it a mistake to take us to Africa?

But then I think of those times in Liberia, Dad, when you would put me barefoot on the back of your motorcycle, and the ocean breeze would whip my hair as the sun set over the Atlantic.  We would pick up the mail and then stop by our favorite beach spot and collect shells.

I think of the times my friends and I would take the canoe out into the swamp, the fear of leeches and crocodiles keeping us out of the water, but we would prance across the spidery roots of the mangrove trees.  There are the memories of that time that the millions of baby crabs hatched, or the bright blue jellyfish that would wash ashore every July, or sitting in the hammock on our front porch and watching the lightning hit the ocean.

The swamp.  Our house in Liberia was directly to the right of this picture.

 Photo credit:  Robin Shea McGee

Denmark, Australia, and Lebanon became real to me because my school friends came from those places. Leprosy and malaria were real, because I saw them too.  I witnessed the devastation of war.  I played with a little boy whose family ate frogs from the swamp when they ran out of food.  I encountered a little girl with a huge abscessed eye, begging outside of the supermarket.  I may have been sheltered from Michael Jackson, but I was not sheltered from the reality of life.

The path we walked to school.  Photo credit:  Robin Shea McGee

By nature, I was cautious, timid, and not at all adventurous.  But this life you chose forced me to become brave.  Airplanes, head scarves, foreign accents, large bugs….all lost their strangeness and scariness.  International travel became routine.  The world would no longer intimidate me.

Scores of missionaries and Africans poured their love and their lives into mine.  I experienced the joy that comes from sacrifice.  Together our family learned what it meant to trust God.  I tasted and saw that Jesus was not just for America.

So yes, Mom and Dad.  There was stress, and there was fear, and there was so much loss.  You could call that suffering.  But the formation of my heart, the richness of that life, and the indestructible joy….make the suffering feel small.   

I know you didn’t make the choice to move to Africa because of Paul and me.  In fact, you made it despite us.  Like the author of that article, you chose to trust our safety and well-being to a Father who knows all about sacrificing his Son.  But in the end, it was the very best choice you could have made for your children.  I’m so glad you did.

Love,

Your Amy

Oh the Weather Outside is Frightful, but the Air Conditioner is So Delightful

Medina Christmas Season, 2015

The best part of this Christmas season, hands down, was having my parents here with us.  In a distant second was the air conditioner, since the week before Christmas is the only time of the year we let ourselves run it during the day.  

4th Graders being silly
HOPAC’s Annual Christmas production:  The only year we’ve had grandparents here to watch it!
Our annual Christmas celebration at Water World with co-workers and friends.
Johnny and his buddy Aaron

Johnny’s first time ever decorating a gingerbread house. Didn’t take him long to get into it.

At Dar es Salaam’s only revolving restaurant.  Except that it wasn’t revolving that day.  We really weren’t that surprised….
We hosted a party for our mission team.
Johnny had just received the photo book I made him of all his pictures, past and present.  He got it out and showed it to just about everybody at the party that day.  “Yook!  John Jeremiah Medina!” he would say, pointing at the cover.
Daddy’s homemade racetrack keeps Johnny busy for hours.

Skyping with people we love:  a Christmas tradition.  

Page 82 of 233

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