1. School becomes your second home. You help yourself to office supplies, you leave your shoes under the secretary’s desk, and you have free reign of the staff lounge.
2. Your friends start to get a little nervous around you, because if they are naughty, it always gets back to the principal.
3. But this isn’t such a big deal because you yourself keep your mom humble by managing to be naughty in almost the exact same ways as the other naughty kids who get sent to her office.
4. Which means you can’t get away with anything. Which kind of stinks.
5. Your parents don’t get surprised or depressed or anything when you bring home your report cards. Because your mom has already seen them and signed them and told your dad about them, so the report card just gets tossed on the table.
6. Speaking of which, your mom sees your teachers every day and visits your class all the time. Which means that she knows everything.
7. This also means there’s nothing exciting to tell your mom. At dinner, you could say, “Hey Mom, next week is Book Week!” and she will say, “Yes, Darling, I organized it.” On the other hand, you also get inside information about upcoming events. This comes in very useful with your social status.
8. Your mom is always around, so you get to hug her multiple times a day. This is great, unless you are a 10-year-old boy. Then you just give your mom glances that say, “Please don’t embarrass me.” But she inevitably still does.
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| Josiah helping Johnny during “Buddy Time.” |
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